You crave him like a nothing else you have encountered, you want to tell him but the voice in the back of your head says don’t not the time when do you take the leap when do you tell him, is he ready to hear it is he ready to make the commitment ?
It can be a serious mind fuck do you or don’t you, I have come to the conclusion that you tell them you express your feeling take the leap and it may turn out better then you ever expected, or you could end up scary him or he may not feel the same way so there is the ever ending mind fuck you personally have going on with in your brain. You eventually do one of two things tell them or you start situations to cause issues to push them away and then they walk cause they are tired of the shit and you still end up alone.
So here is the thing be honest tell them and yes your heart may get hurt but wouldn’t you want to know before you waste years, months waiting to hear those words only to find out you are just a fuck buddy. I am in this situation we got stuck in the comfortable situation and now it is to late I am just the easy and comfortable choice.
So here I am angry and upset am I with him no more with myself cause I feel that I let it happen which on some levels, I did when we met I did not want to have a relationship, between my life and his it just became the hook up of comfort then over the summer something changed for me. I told him and he just kinda jokes about it but I think he is at a part when he does not want a relationship so is it just bad timing? I guess I will never really know but I do know it is time to start taking care of me and my needs so it is adios to him and keep my options open to others.
It breaks my heart on many levels but live and learn right? I am in a rush to get in to relationship at this point no, it is time to heal and stand on my own two feet again before attempting to try again.
I do know what I want and thank god I am not settling for anything less so it may be a long wait but really in the end I am okay with that and I wish him all the luck in the world I hope he finds what he is looking for but I refuse to be to comfortable bed mate the one that he only makes contact with when he is not busy.
So time to move on and not let him know it hurt so much and learn from this mistake.